Funniest Quotes from Emergency Medicine

WFR Live Coverage - A truck that is driving down the road - Getty Images

Often imitated, never duplicated, the WFR (Wilderness First Responder) course taught by the Wilderness Medicine Institute (WMI) has become the nationally recognized standard in wilderness medicine education.

Below are some of the funniest quotes from the course:

  • Hypothermia is a progressive continuum that begins with a cold, unhappy person and ends with a cold, dead person.
  • Mild stupidity can be a sign of mild hypothermia as the brain begins to malfunction, impairing normal thought processing.
  • White blood cells attack germs that have worked their way into the tissues. The contamination migrates to the surface and drains out as pus, composed of the white blood cells that died in the line of duty.
  • 30 & 2 Bro, that’s all you need to know!
  • With cardiopulmonary resuscitation, the rhythm of compressions matches the beat of the Bee Gees’ song Staying Alive. When you’re pumping on someone’s chest, sing along out loud: “ah ah ah ah staying alive, staying alive, ah ah ah ah staying alive…”
  • The medical term for an unhappy brain is “DICC Head” (Disoriented – Irritable – Combative – Coma).
  • Reasons for the brain TO STOP are TOxins – Sugar (lack of) – Temperature (too high or too low) – Oxygen (lack of) – Pressure.
  • We eat breakfast at 7 and have 7 cervical vertebrae. We eat lunch at 12 and have 12 thoracic vertebrae. We eat dinner at 5 and have 5 lumbar vertebrae. Above C4, breathe no more.
  • 1 – I’m number one! ; 2 – What happened to you? ; 3 – Don’t get it on me! ; 4 – Are there any more? ; 5 – Dead or alive?
  • Someone suffering from ataxia may look like they might need a taxi (loss of balance, coordination, muscular control).
  • In a lightning storm, do not stand near a tree: you’ll explode, be squashed and die.
  • With severe hypothermia, you are not dead until you are warm and dead.
  • Ectopic pregnancy will kill you dead.

Live Coverage of the Wilderness First Responder Program

Follow our original live coverage of this intensive medical boot camp training program at the Lewis & Clack College of Portland here: WFR Course.

Among the topics covered are spinal cord injuries, long-term patient care, chest injuries, shock, head injuries, wildnerness wound management, patient assessment, CPR, athletic injuries, fracture management and traction splinting, dislocations, cold injuries, heat illness, altitude illness, cardiac, respiratory and neurological emergencies, blites, stings and poisoning, diabetes, allergies and anaphylaxis, search and rescue, leadership, teamwork and communication, communicable diseases, lightning, submersion, etc.

Emergency Response Background

Genvièv is a Certified Emergency and Pain Control Hypnosis Instructor trained by US Marine and Police Officer Don Mottin.

An Emergency First Responder and a Rescue Diver, she is a trained CPR, AED, First Aid and Oxygen Provider, certified with the Emergency First Response Corporation, PADI, the CMAS, the FMAS and the ANMP, as well as an Animal and Wildlife Emergency Responder.

She is a Wilderness Emergency Medicine First Responder certified by the Wilderness Medicine Institute of NOLS and served on board the Professional Ski Patrol of Mt. Hood.

Legal Boundaries

Clinical hypnotherapists, like Wilderness Emergency First Responders, are not licensed medical professionals. Addressing diagnosed conditions with hypnosis is only done under the supervision of, and in close cooperation with medical doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, nurse practitioners and social workers. As clinical hypnotherapists, we require a physician’s authorization before initiating work on diagnosed conditions. Working in close cooperation with your medical team enables us to ensure your progress in an optimal manner.

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About Genvièv St. Clair

GENVIÈV ST. CLAIR, Fellow and Former President of the Oregon Hypnotherapy Association, is an award-winning Board Certified Instructor with the NGH.

A Valedictorian from the Ivy League University of the Sorbonne in Paris, she graduated summa cum laude from the department of doctorates of one of the oldest and most prestigious universities in the world. With specialized training in forensic discovery, and years of expertise in the medical and legal fields, she acted as a communication liaison in complex and critical situations, including duties for the Department of Homeland Security, the US court system, and leading medical centers.

Featured on Discovery Channel, radio and television programs worldwide, Genvièv is the author of Zen in the Art of Survival, published in the best-selling series Chicken Soup for the Soul, as well as Diving into the Unsolved Mysteries of the Mind, Make a Friend of Fear, Meditation in Motion, Life Line, The Gift, Emotions, and countless magazine columns and articles on performance, achievement and success. Her story is featured in Chicken Soup to Inspire the Body and Soul – Motivation to get over the hump and on the road to a better life. She produces an educational health and wellness series on YouTube.

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